Simple Knowles was a pieman

It was supposed to be a quick hour or so in the kitchen, but it turned into a scavenger hunt. All this as I assembled the ingredients for a pie.
Not just any pie, of course. If you have been following the recent, odd path of my life (and I don't blame you if you have been focused on the Canadiens, the Canucks, Helena Geurgis or other issues of great import, instead), you know that I was offered the assignment of making a pie, to be sold at auction.
This is all in a good cause, of course ­-- it will raise money for the New Hamburg Interfaith Counselling Centre. It should also (vested interest is never far away, is it?) raise awareness of my campaign for mayor.
It's because of the latter that I was fingered as a pastry chef. Each of the candidates for Wilmot mayor was invited to bake a pie, to be sold in this event. Also on hand will be well-known piemen Mayor Wayne Roth and Harold Albrecht, MP.
I think the Silent Auction organizers figured the mayoral candidates would see
this as a bit of a competition, and urge their friends to rally around and bid. Which will, in the end, fatten the take for this worthwhile charity. Good thinking.
One cannot simply jump in and make a pie, though. It takes planning and forethought. I decided to make a "community minded pie", which is tough, since pies have neither community nor, come to think of it, a mind.
But I gave it my best shot, and this is where the scavenging bit comes in. After consulting with my sous-chef (she said it's okay if I call her that), I decided to make an apple pie. Nothing says "home" like an apple pie, in my opinion. So I wandered over to Pfennings and asked if I could get some organic apples. They were very kind, loading up a small box with organic spies, and then refusing payment because the cause is worthwhile. So I had my apples, from Wilmot township.
But in the spirit of "community", I wanted to add other touches of the township to the pie. So I was off to collect a couple of free range eggs from New Dundee area chickens ­-- I'm told I have a corner on the poultry vote, supported by chickens in Dundee and that rogue rooster in Baden I have defended in print. However, I'm also told that chickens can't actually vote, so this is a moral victory at best.
I adapted the recipe to include a splash of maple syrup --­ not only is this as Canadian as rolling up a rim, this is maple syrup made from the trees along our very own Shade Street, and boiled up to perfection by my friend and neighbour Paul Mackie.
Finally, what is apple pie without cheese? So I dropped by Oak Grove Cheese and picked up a pound or so of their old Cheddar. Finer cheddar you won't find, anywhere. This is a nice dessert combo, but, to tell the truth, I was also covering my bets ­-- if no one thinks my pie is worth a bid, at least they will be willing to buy the cheese!
All the assembling completed, I started to peel and slice apples. A lot of apples. And to make the crust (using lard, on the rather insistent advice of my mother-in-law, who proclaimed that flaky crust demands lard). Nancy and I worked together to weave the pastry lattice atop the pie, and popped it into the oven.
Then, she had to make me stop opening the oven every three minutes to make sure it wasn't burning. Eventually, I left the kitchen for a while, to avoid that particular compulsion.
A few hours after I write this, it will be sold at auction, along with the pies made by the other guys. Tell you what... I'll report back after the fact, with an up to the minute comment about the proceeds from the pie.